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Wednesday, September 14, 2011

P.Y.H.O - Finding the silver lining

Having had some time to come to terms with yesterday's post (well, the other day now), we've found some good in my husband losing his job. Granted, this means we have to move while I'm pregnant, into my in-laws', and find a caretaker for our cat (I refuse to give her up). I'm concerned about my daughter being able to attend her school...I'm concerned if I will be able to give birth at the birthing center...but I think this will all turn out.

Contains mild language

A possible career change. Dan is never appreciated at apartment maintenance jobs, oftentimes, being downright treated like shit. My husband has leadership qualities and won't hesitate to tell you if there's a better option to doing something. This tends to scare his higher-ups, so they'll run and tell their higher-ups some lie or point out every minute bad thing he did, just to make him look bad. Simply, they're threatened by him. There's no other explaining it. Not when you do better quality work, get jobs done faster, and the residents love him (many request only him in their home)... Another downside is fear of losing your home. Many places want you out in a week, but some will give you longer. So, not only are you losing your job but your home as well. It's also really hard to find an apartment that they're willing to part with when you have an army of kids. While Dan is amazing at what he does (I've worked with him, I know what he's capable of), we think it's time for a change.

His boss was a turd.  This guy was a liar and passive-aggressive. Dan was supposed to be reimbursed for gas, it was never brought up. Dan was supposed to be working 40 hours a week, but was dropped down to 35, thereby putting us at less than what he made at the other place we moved from. He briefly put Dan on leasing apartments, but was taken off due to one resident being evicted for being an inconsiderate douche (which is hard to predict). He never got paid extra for the extra work and only got paid one $50 bonus even though he had leased a couple places. Once his paycheck was delayed and there was one time recently when his paycheck bounced. The guy doesn't like to pay for anything or anyone. Some of his employees work for almost nothing, but screw up all the time - he'll keep them around though. Dan wasn't supposed to be cleaning apartments or painting them, but has since day one because they guy doesn't want to pay someone else. I used to think that his working around his own properties was admirable. How many bosses/owners will actually get their hands dirty? Apparently, when they're cheap.

Moving in with my in-laws. I know that is something most people dread, but it's really not so much a bad thing. Yes, there's a lot I'm not looking forward to like having to live with someone else period, or trying to keep my kids from destroying their non-babyproofed house. But they're both sick, and my father-in-law is having heart surgery soon. They're going to need some help and they already need Dan's help with work on the house. I love my mother-in-law. Sure, she can be a bit crotchety, but I can blow it off and understand that she's in an immense amount of pain due to her vascular necrosis. We enjoy talking to each other. I will also be able to allow my kids to play outside...in a real live yard! Not some patch of grass. We can even safely walk around the neighborhood.

Getting out of this city.  We live in a dying city. Back when the Ford plant was still open, there was more to this place. But now, most of the storefronts are closed and there are vacant and condemned houses everywhere. This place is also known for its ghettos, and the infected area is spreading due to the crumbling economy. I'm not very fond of living in this house anymore. I'm sick of listening to people hanging out two feet from my window because there's a parking lot right there. There's no privacy whatsoever and my hardwood floors are loud as hell. The whole house is loud. You can practically hear someone fart when they're in the bathroom and you're in the basement. Smells stick to the house for hours, sometimes days. It's freezing in the winter and sweltering in the summer thanks to the massive gaps in the doorways. And the spiders....:shudders: Massive, prehistoric-sized spiders.

So, all in all, I think this will be good for us. I won't deny that I'm worried about what the future will hold. But I think we'll be ok. Still pissed, but I've come to terms.


Camilleta said...

Thanks for letting me know about Superpoints, I will have to check it out!

Not to diminish your other problems right now, but I feel so bad about your kitty. If you lived near me I might be able to help you find a foster/temporary home for him/her. I have a close friend that has a large network of everything cat related, she rescues kitties and as 3 of her own. She actually once kept my dog for me when I was a teenager and had a fight with my parents and moved in with a friend. You don't happen to live in or around MD?

DazzleMea said...

Aw, thanks, that's so sweet of you to offer help. ♥ Unfortunately, I live in Ohio. My mom is going to take her. I'm still worried how it's going to work out though. They have two cats and 3 ferrets. My cat does pretty well with the ferrets (although, she plays too rough with them), but I'm really not sure how she will fare with the other cats. She's never been around another cat, except through the window and that ended pretty badly. And their one cat is a neurotic mess. So, we'll see I guess. I'm going to try everything in my power before resigning myself to giving her away. I don't believe pets are disposable...plus she's a *great* cat and is amazing with kids/babies and my youngest adores her.

Tara R. said...

I'm so sorry about your husband's job situation. Sending you all good luck wishes for the move and job hunting. I'm impressed with your positive attitude.

(visiting via PYHO)

Di said...

I'm glad you are able to see the silver lining. Its rough when everything hits at once but many times it does all work out for the better. My husband was laid off in July and found a new job the next day which paid better and was closer to home! Wishing you all the same luck!

Anastasia said...

A hard decision, but obviously something that need to be done. And I love that you put a positive spin on everything. You are a warrior!

DazzleMea said...

Thank you, it means a lot... Right now, I keep thinking back to this post and appreciating your positive thoughts...His boss keeps sending him home which means we're screwed financially.

shell said...

sounds like you are focusing on the positive!

A Mother's Thoughts said...

You seem to be maintaining your sanity through all the grey! I am sorry that your husband lost his job, but it sounds as though he is worth way more then what was handed to him. And as for your inlaws I soul hardedly believe that it is our responsibility to give as much as we get. They raised us and eventually it comes back, where we can repay the favor. Keep you chin up because it sounds like you are doing a wonderful job keeping your family together through the rainstorm!!


DazzleMea said...

Thanks. =) I believe the same about family. Our family's done so much for us...I couldn't live with myself if I didn't do all that I could to return the favor. No, they may not have always been perfect, but they've done the best they could at that time. It's actually my hope to find a place large enough to take care of them should we need to.

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